Cherry Creek Psychology, Dr. Maximillian Wachtel

It may seem too early to start thinking about the 2007 holiday season, but I was at the Cherry Creek Mall last night buying a coat for my daughter, and I noticed that the mall staff had already set up the Christmas pavilion, filled with snow globes and various other holiday accouterments (did I come anywhere close to spelling that correctly?). Incidentally, the pavilion appears to be sponsored by the movie “Fred Claus,” which if you haven’t seen an ad for it yet, promises to be in the running for worst movie of all time (I would love for readers to comment on movies they think are worse).

Anyway, since the mall thinks it is time for the holidays, then time for the holidays it is. Along with all of the festivities, family fun and presents often comes stress, sadness and grief. For some, the thought of spending so much time with family is terrifying. For others, the absence of a recently-lost loved one weighs heavily this time of year. For still others, the notion of overeating and gaining more weight leaves them feeling hopeless.

As most of you are well aware, November and December can be extremely difficult months for a lot of people. But, it is important to keep in mind that this is supposed to be a joyful time where our everyday lives can be suspended while we spend time with friends and family and show others how much we care about them. And at the very least, no one expects you to get all that much done at work, so you can afford to slack off a bit, right?

Of course, many people find working through issues brought up around the holidays with a a professional to be helpful, and I would recommend that you talk to someone if you are feeling a lot of anxiety or depression. Even meeting with a therapist for one or two sessions to gain some tips on how to deal with holiday stress could be useful.

Good luck, try to remain calm, and beware of Fred Claus– Max Wachtel, Ph.D. (www.CherryCreekPsychology.com; maxwachtel@CherryCreekPsychology.com)

3. Don’t Overeat.

This sounds simple enough, but it is incredibly difficult during the holidays. There are cookies everywhere, one huge meal after another and parties galore. It is not uncommon for people to gain five or ten pounds in the month of December. Think about that: five to ten pounds. That is like adding the size of a housecat to your abdomen and carrying it with you everywhere you go. It adds to the physical stress on your body (your knees and your back especially) and the extra weight and calories can add unneeded emotional stress as well. You worry about your health. You worry about how to lose the weight in January. You worry about what you look like with your cat-sized mid-section.

Rather than eating whatever you want during the holidays and vowing to lose the pounds next year, vow to keep the pounds off now. Eat smaller meals. Limit yourself to one or two cookies per day. Avoid drinking too much at parties (after all, alcohol is nothing more than a long chain of sugars). If you can show a little restraint in December in terms of your eating habits, you will reduce your holiday stress and set yourself up for a great 2007.

Tomorrow’s tip: 4. Spend Your Money Wisely

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I just got back from an 8-mile run. It is supposed to be in the 60’s today in Denver, and I ran in shorts. Makes me wish it was Spring already! Thanks for reading– Max Wachtel, Ph.D. (www.CherryCreekPsychology.com)

2. Find Quiet Time For Yourself

It can be important for you to have some good alone time during the holidays. During periods of stress, we use time alone to relax and recharge. By finding time for yourself, you will feel re-energized, refreshed and ready to spend extended time with the extended family. By skipping much-needed alone time, you are setting yourself up for increased stress and a high probability that you will snap at some point.

What can you do to be alone? Tell everyone you need to do some last-minute shopping and then use the time to do whatever you like to do when you are alone: Go for a walk. Go for a drive. Read a book at a coffee shop or library. Exercise at the gym. Usually, family members don’t balk at the “last-minute shopping” excuse, because it means you are going to buy them presents.

Tomorrow’s tip: Don’t Overeat

 Thanks for reading– Max Wachtel, Ph.D. (www.CherryCreekPsychology.com)

Since it is that time of year again, I thought I would offer some helpful tips to reduce the stress that inevitably comes with the holiday season. The pressure of being surrounded by family (even if your family normally gets along well), the presents, the food, the New Year’s Resolutions…they can all add up and take their toll on your mental well-being. I will offer one tip per day over the next nine days, and I hope you find them helpful. Here is the first one: 1. Try actually talking to your family. As we learned from yesterday’s post, verbalizing your feelings can lead to a decrease in negative emotions. For that reason alone, it can be helpful to talk about your holidy blues with family members. It can also be important for them to understand why you are upset about whatever it is that is bothering you. They can’t read your mind, and as obvious as you think the problem is, others may not see it. If you get angry every year because your family assumes you will be cooking dinner for all 25 of them on Christmas Day, tell them so. They are probably not purposefully making you mad–they might just see the dinner at your house to be a nice family tradition. If you let them know, in a kind way, that you feel they are taking advantage of you and you need a break this year, chances are that they will respond well. At the very least, you will make them aware of your feelings and that will ease some of your holiday stress. In other news, I am heading out to the Denver County Jail this morning to do an evaluation. I need to look at my notes before I go, but I think I remember this being an attempted murder case. With that said, I am debating about what Reducing Holiday Stress Tip #2 should be. I am thinking either: Find Quiet Time For Yourself, or Don’t Spend Time with Those Accused of Attempted Murder. Check back tomorrow to see which one I’ve chosen to write about. Thanks for reading– Max Wachtel, Ph.D. (www.CherryCreekPsychology.com)